Dear Liberals...

(First off, let me apologize in advance Sagacious Hillbilly. You ain't gonna like this!)

We have an election coming up. It's one of the most high-stakes ever. We have a stalled Democrat party, an administration already out of gas with only two years on the clock, facing off against the most radical right wing challenge in living memory. In short, a neofascist Trojan horse is parked outside the gates and we're getting ready to let it in. So, of course, we progressives need to get out there, vote our asses off and snatch back America from the brink? Right..???

Nope.

I can't. Because if I do vote according to my conscience, I can't do anything except not vote. If I do reflexively check Democrat, all I'd do is show that conscience matters as little to me as it does to the pols in DC. All I'd do is say "yeh, OK, you guys did nothing for me but instead of registering my frustration by withdrawing my support, I'll just trot along and support you anyway." Sorry. I just can't do that.

I can't give Obama my vote because we're still illegally occupying two foreign nations at enormous cost to the country. Even the recent 'withdrawal' from Iraq is a shell game: We're still there. Only we're paying private contractors 5-10 times more to fill in for the troops we've brought home.

I can't give Obama my vote because, like tens of millions of others, I still can't get health insurance for myself, my wife or my kid. I'm still living in a country where if I get sick, I'm bankrupt, maybe homeless and, if I died, I die intestate.

I can't give Obama my vote because gay people in America still don't have equal civil rights and, forgive me for my quaint altruism, I can't feel free either in a society that discriminates against anyone. Gays still can't marry or serve openly in the military. Not only has Obama let this slide, he's even worked to block legal efforts to shut down DADT.

But most of all, I can't give Obama my vote because he's given a free pass to the Bush war criminals. He's excused and effectively condoned torture, illegal detention, the suspension of habeas corpus and warrantless spying on US citizens by refusing to indict and by quietly continuing the same shameful policies. Obama missed a chance to send the much-needed message that America is better than that. Instead, he just showed the world that Bushco's squalid barbarism is now the norm. That is unforgivable. I can't vote for Obama for the exact same reason I could never have voted for Bush... same crimes, different criminals.

This is a question of conscience and, at some point, you have to go with it however hard the decision and however painful the consequences.

So bring on that neofascist Trojan horse and live with the consequences. Maybe we have to live through the worst symptoms of the conservative disease, run the fever, to finally rid ourselves of it. There's no point in drugging ourselves with a low-dose Democrat "get out the vote" that'll do nothing except prolong the status quo.

Don't run scared... And remember: it's all about conscience.

Joe Miller Goes Stasi

Joe Miller, the bearded goober running for the Senate in Alaska, made news yesterday after his thugs handcuffed a reporter from The Alaska Dispatch who had bothered him by... errm... asking questions. Miller's private security detail cuffed Tony Hopfinger and accused him of "trespassing" (at a public event in a public building). Then cops arrived and released him.

This came after a nutty town hall speech in which Miller cited the Berlin Wall as a good example of effective border security. And this pr*ck is leading Democrat Scott McAdams by seven points? WTF Alaska??? This is just sad and dumb.

The Midterm Miasma: Two Bowls of Sh*t

It's been a while...

Back in 2007/8, Obama personified and promised the change we desperately wanted. Now, not so much. We've had two years of faux progressivism and tin-eared determination to "reach across the aisle". And for what?

It might be unfair to say nothing has been achieved since he got elected but, from a liberal perspective, it's painfully true. True too that he seems to have gone out of his way to deliberately piss off liberals and screw over the people who elected him. Crappy healthcare reform, ongoing wars, no middle class tax cuts, no real Wall Street reform, no real help on the housing crisis... man, we bought a f*cking ringer.

So as the midterms draw nearer, the pundits yammer about impending Democrat rout fueled by widespread liberal disillusionment. Amazingly, the really, really bad Republicans are in with a shot of being Kings of The Hill again. Wow. How can we be so pissed off with Obama we'd let that happen? Because, as Lewis Black once quipped, our elections are a choice between two bowls of sh*t. And that's never been as true as it is now. Who really gives a damn? If I stay home and the Rethugs get their golden opportunity to cripple government and dig us all deeper into the ditch, will it really be so much worse than giving the Dems another two years to dither and pussy out?

TPM claim that a quarter of us folks who supported Obama in 2008 are planning on "defecting to the GOP or considering voting against the party in power this fall". But in line with the two bowls of sh*t principle, "just as many people who backed Republican presidential nominee John McCain are either supporting Democrats now or still considering how to vote." Has this country ever seemed so exhausted and disillusioned with its democracy?

Now I'm not dickish enough to switch my vote to GOP just because I'm pissed with Obama. Worst case scenario, I'll just sit this one out or, maybe, turn up and put a grudging 'x' next to whatever Democrat loser appears on my local ticket. And I'd guess American progressives aren't really set on a Jones Town-style mass suicide pact. We might tell pollsters that we ain't voting Democrat any more but I doubt we mean it. We're just doing the only thing we can to try and effect change from a management that doesn't appear to be listening: threaten a strike. But it ain't working. Obama hasn't even thrown us a bone on DADT, marijuana in California or any of the prog-friendly quick fixes he could sign off on before the midterms.

Hell, he could at least sprinkle a little cilantro in one of the bowls of sh*t... we can't even get that.

Libertarian Insanity

Even though the specious Libertarianism 'philosophy' is enjoying something of a renaissance thanks to the 'Baggers, let's not forget the reality. It's still a crackpot movement entirely peopled with scowling lunatics. From would-be Timothy McVeighs to smarmy sadists like Rand Paul... they're all f*cking nuts.

Need a reminder? How 'bout the Johnathan Irish story? This New Hampshire 'Oaf Keeper' had his newborn kid taken away by CPS for "political reasons" and fellow libertarian nutjobs went crazy about it. Now baby Cheyenne is back with the parents after  "pressure from the public".

Reality? Irish is a wife-beating, child abuser with a house full of guns and a long history of violence and his kid was taken away for her own safety after showing signs of sexual abuse. Oh my. How tyrannical.  So how do Libertarians suggest that kids are protected from abuse without the big, nasty government getting involved? Says The Slate:

The most amazing voice from the anti-tyranny forces, though, belonged to a woman named Amanda Biondolillo, from Concord:

"The family should be left to resolve it on their own," Biondolillo said. "Or private enterprise - private companies can contact the family and say, 'We heard you were hitting your kids. Can you stop that?'"

Is Amanda Biondolillo a prankster who shows up at protests to say things to make libertarians look like morons? Her online presence looks sincere.

It's easy to say but I'll say it again: Libertarians are f*cking d*ckheads.

Random Picture of The Day

I'm not the healthiest eater in the world. Unfortunately, I tend to treat my body more like a New Jersey landfill than a temple. But even I won't touch McDonald's. The "McDonalds Happy Meal Project" kinda made me feel validated.

Sally Davies, a New York-based photographer, posted a daily pic of said happy meal sitting on a table for a few months hoping to show it's gradual deterioration. But nothing happened. No mold, no discoloration... nada. Undead fast food???

Haley Barbour 2012: The GOP Nightmare

Mississippi Governor Haley Barbour or someone similar...

Unsurprisingly, GOP movers and shakers are peeing their panties at the thought of Haley Barbour running for president in 2012. The Mississippi governor and unreconstructed white supremacist is dead-set on running, his party is "begging" him not to... As a liberal, I have one thing to say: "Go Haley Barbour!"

Bye Bye Dumb, Hello Dumber

Out of the way Mooselini... here comes Christie.

Sarah Palin is plenty dumb by most standards. But not enough for the 'Baggers apparently. She's now trailing NJ governor Chris Christie as Tea Party favorite and president führer choice for 2012. Oh my. What act of breathtaking stupidity could have made this fat f*ck more popular with the mouth-breathers than Saint Sarah??? Here goes...

Christie's just canceled a $8.7bn tunnel project in his state that would have reduced congestion, improved air quality, sped up commute times, created jobs and generally boosted the local economy. Obviously a no-brainer for a no-brainer like Christie... Veto! Yup. A typical 'Bagger dick move that leaves everyone poorer - including the masochistic mental midgets of the Tea Party who quickly rewarded his stupidity by making him new chief of their tribe.

Nobel prizewinning Paul Krugman said Christie's canceling of the NJ tunnel project was a "destructive and incredibly foolish decision on multiple levels". It confirmed that America has become "a nation whose politicians seem to compete over who can show the least vision, the least concern about the future and the greatest willingness to pander to short-term, narrow-minded selfishness".

I couldn't put it better than Krugman. These people are like guys who strut around wearing tank tops in sub-zero weather because they associate reckless imprudence with manliness. Yeh, take that corner at 60mph, snap the filter off of that Marlboro, fix that antennae in a rain storm, light that fart... self preservation's for p*ssies.

Random Picture of The Day

This map shows the frequency of straight visitors to dating site OK Cupid who are "interested" in same sex hook-ups. The bluer areas show fewer and the redder areas more. No surprise that bi-curiosity ain't big in Mississippi or Alabama where curiosity of any kind can stil get you found dead in a ditch. But how Brokeback is Oregon and why? How closeted are Arizona's Maricopa and Pima counties? Weird.

The Whole F*cking Tea Party is a Nazi Reenactment, Part Zwei

Ohio Tea Bag candidate Rich Ioott (third from left): fake Nazi, real Jackass.

We have neighbors who recently moved here from Tennessee and are making themselves pretty unpopular. See, these hillbilly wannabes have foregone flying Old Glory or the Lone Star in their yard and fly the stars and bars instead. And, to compound the offense, they then whine like butt-hurt p*ssies when people call them racist trash.

Sorry, hillbillies. You can't fly the rebel flag and claim you're no racist. It would be like flying a f*cking swastika and claiming you have no problem with Jews. It doesn't f*cking work. You either buy into the symbol and everything it stands for or you leave it alone. Any 10th-grader knows the confederacy ran on slavery. It wasn't just an aspect of it, it defined the whole system and the civil war that was fought to depose it. Nope. That flag ain't cool. (Lynyrd Skynyrd and the Duke boys might qualify for a free pass, but everyone else can f*ck off.)

I don't know if our "The South Will Rise Again" neighbors are 'Baggers too. But don't that attitude put you in mind of a Tea Bagger? The Tea Party too runs on racism. It's not just a part of it, the whole system is fueled by the synergy of haters coming together to hate more effectively. Yet ain't these cake-an-eat-it f*cks the loudest to whine when you accuse them being racists? (Man, you can't even satirize blacks, Hispanics and queers as subhuman any more without liberals getting all up in your grill about racism...)

Here's a new billboard from the "Tea Party Patriots" of Colorado - today's example of partying like it's 1939:

That's some formidable stereotyping... There's "Osama Obama" because 'Baggers don't like Islam; "Chicago Obama" because 'Baggers don't like them urban political sophisticates; "Charro Obama" because 'Baggers don't like Mexicans and, last but not least, we have "Flaming Obama" because 'Baggers don't like them gays. Then stick in a George Soros vulture, a UN vulture and a few variously labeled rats... and voila! It's almost a perfect glimpse into the roiling psyche of a Tea Partier.

Or a Nazi.

Tell me it ain't so?

More Douche-tude From The Flip Flop King

I don't know whether John McCain actually sold his soul to the devil. Or did  the devil turned him down because the thing was as worthless as a Zimbabwean dollar? Damn, here's one guy proudly and unashamedly operating on zero scruples, zero conviction, zero credibility... he's like a freaking political Prius. Lest we forget, here's Y2K McCain:

"Neither party should be defined by pandering to the outer reaches of American politics and the agents of intolerance."

Wholesome words to live by. Or not... here's McCain speaking to a recent Tea Party rally:

“You know the President says that, quote, we’re the party of no. No, we’re not the ‘party of no.’ We’re the ‘party of hell no.’”

Outer reaches? Agents of intolerance? McCain sounds less like an agent, more like a guy aiming to be regional director of the Outer Reaches branch of Intolerance, inc.

Time To Shame The Shameless

Arizona Repubs are sending out typically hysterical anti-immigrant mailers defending that state's neofascist SB1070 bill. They say 'democrats' who oppose the bill want to "invite drugs and violence into our neighborhoods, schools and communities."

First, opposing SB1070 is not a 'democrat' issue. Unless people like Marco Rubio, Jeb Bush, Lindsey Graham and Karl f*cking Rove have suddenly become Democrats.

Second, this is yet another fugly example of fear mongering, scapegoating bullsh*t from people seeking to make the immig-ration debate into a good ol' fashioned immig-rant pogrom. It's nothing to do with policy, it's to do with bullying and criminalizing people. And with playground rules in effect, the more powerless and less able to defend themselves those people are, the better.

This is the kind of racist crap that needs pushing back to the crazy fringes where it belongs. If we don't call BS on race baiting, if we don't shame the mainstream pols who've succumbed to using this cheap and nasty tactic, we look like a nation of bigoted a**holes. Shame on them, shame on us.

My Mistake

So it turned out that yesterday's book hurler wasn't an angry 'bagger. He was in fact an "overexuberant fan of Obama's" who just wanted him to read his book. Oh well. This might just be a humble blog, but at least I 'fess up when I'm wrong (unlike, say, Fox, CNN, MSNBC, etc.)

Random Picture of The Day Also...

The multiple levels of irony are inescapable... an angry wingnut hurls a book at Obama during a campaign rally in Philadelphia. Maybe 'baggers don't know what books are for, but at least they seem to be conducting trial and error experiments to figure it out.

Rich Iott? The Whole F*cking Tea Party is a Nazi Reenactment

Race baiting from Nazi Germany to Tea Party 'Meriku.

You could not even dream up Rich Iott. He's that Ohio Tea Party congressional candidate and Waffen SS historical reenactment enthusiast who's drawn widespread criticism from Republican leaders Eric Cantor. Hilarious? Yes. But not so funny when you consider how much of a giant Nazi reenactment the whole f*cking Tea Party movement is anyway.

Take, for instance, those "scary Mexican" stock photo guys who've been doing the rounds in regional political ads. They've popped up in Tea Party spots from Nevada to New York, always described as 'illegal immigrants' and chosen because they fit the surly, swarthy, threatening Hispanic stereotype the racist 'baggers are so keen to advance. (Surprisingly, they chose not to Photoshop in gold teeth and mustaches.)

Isn't it amazing how one photo of disgruntled Mexican farmers (actually taken in Mexico for a story about crop failure) gets to become the modern equivalent of the sly Jew stereotype so beloved by the Nazis? See, they're not like us... just look at them... they all look like that! Ooga booga!

Back in the tag, the Nazis scared paranoid, conservative Germans with 'ooga booga' Jew caricatures. Nothing new. The mythical sly Jew had been around for so long it was an easy button for the Nazis to push. Now the Tea Partiers are scaring paranoid, conservative Americans with their 'ooga booga' Hispanic stereotype. Also nothing new... The only thing that is surprising is the degree to which prehistoric Nazi sh*t like this is being tolerated in the world's "most advanced nation". It's like Hitler who? Holo-what..?

Straight-up racist motherf*ckers like Sharron Angle, Jim DeMint, etc., have dived into the sewer of history to fish out the Nazi play book. And they're playing it like champs. Chapter one: Present your racial enemy as scary, as inherently depraved, as generally less than human. That way, folks won't feel sympathy when you victimize them, whether through words or genocide. Make someone seem less than human and you can do whatever the f*ck you want to them... This worked so well for the Nazis, they were able to kill off entire minority groups and regular Germans barely gave a sh*t.

Makes you wonder what the Tea Party Reichsführers are planning. Mass-deportations for Mexicans? Internment camps and forced labor? A general denial of civil rights for Hispanics that could only be feasible once they've been adequately "dehumanized" by race-baiting propaganda and rendered non-sympathetic to the majority? Hey, just because we're Americans not Germans, doesn't mean it ain't gonna work. It worked before: Native Americans were subjected to a full three centuries of genocide ending only when they were finally granted US citizenship and protection under the law in 1924. Black folks were also considered not fully human until the civil rights act made it trickier to hang them from trees just because you felt like it.

Like I said, we've been there before. And it feels like the Tea Party wants to take us back. "Cheap Nazi Stereotyping"? If it quacks like a Nazi...

Random Picture of The Day

Scary-ass sheep on meth? You got it. And it's all in the interests of science: "In Safety Study, Sheep on Meth Are Shocked With Tasers". Err... run that by me again?

Random Picture of The Day Too

C*ntservatives like to portray the Mafia-style protection racket that is US health care as the 'envy of the world'. To back up this bullsh*t, they spread memes about foreigners flocking to the US to partake of it. Many Canadians, for instance, get sick of waiting for treatment under their own national health and cross the border to the US begging for help. How many? Hmm...

Another slam-dunk c*ntservative talking point right there.

Cheap Hitler Comparisons? Maybe Not So Much...

Sometimes you just have to say it...

If there wasn't so much at stake in November, it would be downright funny the way 'Bagger candidates like Sharron Angle and Rand Paul seem to get more popular the less they speak. It's like folks are so desperate for a break from the 'business as usual' pols that they'll vote for anybody else - until they speak and even the dimmest voters start getting the crazy vibe off them.

Supporting a 'Bagger candidate is a lot like getting pissed off with Pep Boys and taking your car to some random guy across the street to get it fixed instead. He promises a way sweeter deal and says "yeh, stick it to the man... screw those big guys!" But then you pick your car up and realize your exhaust's been replaced with a vacuum cleaner hose and the whole engine's f*cked because the dude dropped acid and filled your gas tank with jello. Yup. The 'Baggers may seduce those who are jaded with 'business as usual'. But jumping from 'business as usual' to 'clueless lunacy' isn't really the way to go.

But watching 'Bagger candidates pop up on the news spouting ridiculous ideas gives me that same feeling I used to have about Bush: They seem dumb as rocks. But you don't get elected if you're dumb. So there must be smart guys arranging the rocks in Satan's Zen garden. With Bush, it was the Neocons and the American imperialist agenda. With the 'Baggers, it's the corporate aristocracy and their 1890s style robber baron fascism. Just as Bush was the Neocons' useful idiot, so the 'Bagger candidates are the Koch brothers' useful idiots.

So whenever you see Christine O'Donnell or Sharron Angle running away from the press like celebs fleeing the Hollywood Paparazzi, it would seem fairly reasonable to assume they've been told by their puppet masters to shut up. You can bet those egomaniacal loons would love nothing more than to rant all day long to anyone willing to listen... but they've been told to "keep schtum"... and that cute Germanism brings me right along to...

You know who else didn't like speaking too much to unscreened audiences? Yup. Said Raymond Gram Swing, a news commentator for the Mutual Broadcasting System network back in the 1930s:

“It’s well to bear in mind that Hitler never speaks at the microphone without the background of a frenzied audience. He never tries to talk quietly and persuasively to an individual listener. He talks to crowds who must give a crowds response. This is an essential of the totalitarian leadership."

Again, I'm not one for mindless Hitler comparisons. I'm not one for cheap Jeffrey Dahmer comparisons either... but if you were caught with a fridge full of brains, people would be forgiven a Dahmer reference. And there is an unmistakable whiff of Nazi M.O. about the 'Baggers. Sucks but it's true. The Nazis, just like the Tea Party, leveraged popular frustration with government and sold themselves as a fresh, new alternative. And they also carefully kept a lid on the crazy just long enough to get elected by a conservatively inclined nation not known for its love of extremists. In this respect, Sharron Angle couldn't look more Hitler-ish if she grew a mustache and had that 'one big bang in the middle of the forehead' thing going on... Cheap Nazi comparison? I'd say not so much.

A Nation of A**holes: Habitat For Inhumanity

The case of the guy in Tennessee whose house burned down because he forgot to pay some local surcharge got me thinking again about how far we've sunk. The fire crew turn out and stand by watching as the guy's house burns with three dogs and a cat inside... When this can happen, and a c*nt like Glenn Beck can come on the air and mocks the guy, there really is something broken. We truly have become a nation of a**holes. So when did the c*ntservatives who applauded this inhumane travesty finally get their way? When did common standards of decency and humanity lose their 'common' and become arguable?

Another example of us becoming a nation of a**holes who've forgotten what it is to be human: "Authorities have found the bodies of 252 illegal immigrants in the Arizona desert this year, an all-time high—even though the number of people crossing illegally is down." Thanks to those humane conservative types who obsess over 'border security' and block humanitarian efforts to provide water and shade for 'illegals'. Nice. You want to cross illegally? You die. Men. Women. Children. Conservatives don't care. Says the first commenter:

"Good-we are making progress. Maybe the next batch of them will think twice before breaking in to the country!"

Like I said, that's men, women and children dying agonizing deaths in the desert as their brains overheat and their subcutaneous fat boils... and a perfectly respectable American a**hole says good. Probably the same kind of a**hole who'd support KY libertard Rand Paul when he dribbles about wanting to screw old folks with a $2,000 Medicare deductible. Probably the same kind of guy who'd vote for a callous bitch like Sharron Angle who probably plans on harvesting the poor as Soylent Green.

Why? Why have we become a nation of a**holes? Why have so many of us been overtaken by the urge to say f*ck you to everyone else? I'm not that old, but I remember when times were better than this.

You Couldn't Make This Up...

Most times when people write "you couldn't make this up", you usually could. But this..? Are you ready for Christine O'Donnell's "Bozogate"?

Seems the nuttiest wingnut in the Tea Party fruitcake really is the daughter of Bozo The Clown:

The O'Donnell family's past claims that her father Daniel O'Donnell had worked as Bozo sparked an uprising of online commenters who insisted that no, Daniel O'Donnell was not listed on Wikipedia as having been one of the many regionally licensed Bozo the Clown TV hosts... But now [Mark Leibovich at the New York Times] has sorted things out -- Daniel O'Donnell was an occasional understudy Bozo, not a full-time holder of the Bozo mantle.

If you ain't ROTFLYAO right now at the thought that Christine O'Donnell's pa wasn't even a proper Bozo The Clown but a sub, you're probably going to vote for her. Unless you succumb to some disease contracted by licking windows that'll keep you home on election day.

Democrat Spinelessness

Jack Conway, Kentucky Democrat Senatorial candidate, running on a platform of "whatever the other guy says".

Rand Paul is running for the Senate in Kentucky on a raft of fiscally suicidal ideas that could only make sense if you wear tin foil hats and like to direct invisible traffic in the street. His Democrat challenger is thus faced with two options:

1. Do you point out the obvious absurdity of Rand Paul's positions and offer voters rational alternatives that wouldn't bankrupt the country in five minutes flat and turn us into a medieval fiefdom?

or...

2. Do you ditch your own principles and start offering the same crazy ideas as your opponent like you're Target trying to match WalMart's low, low prices across the street?

No prizes for guessing which way Jack Conway jumped.

As a species, Democrat candidates are mostly invertebrates. But Democrat candidates are also closely related to chameleons and are able to change their appearances to blend with any background. In Kentucky, for instance, Jack Conway hides himself by turning a shade of deep red and starts pushing for the extension of Bush tax cuts for everybody - even the mega-rich.

When Obama's busy asking progressives to suck it up and fight for "Democrat values", it doesn't send a particularly helpful message if Democrat candidates themselves can't even be bothered to stand up for "Democrat values".

Instead of presenting an antidote to conservatism, pussyish f*cks like Jack Conway offer only a non-brand, knock-off version of the same poison. God help us.