Saturday, August 27, 2011

Forgotten Beck's Desperate Bid For Attention

I'm sure social conservative conmen like Glen Beck get boners every time they hear about natural disasters. Hurricanes, earthquakes, fires... whatever... they're all golden opportunities for them to get on the news spouting god-awfully callous garbage that's sure to get them noticed.

Hadn't everyone forgotten about Glen Beck already? I guess Becky worried we might have so here he comes with this wrathful-god-referencing salvo of stupid:

Glenn Beck: Hurricane Irene Is A 'Blessing'

This artfully timed crap will raise Becky's diminished profile no end... he's even got me mentioning him again... dammit! So let's forget that schmuck and remember a few of the greats instead:

Pat Robertson on the Haiti earthquake: Haiti "Cursed" After "Pact to the Devil"

"Pastor" John Hagee on Katrina: New Orleans was struck because it was "Planning A Sinful Homosexual Rally"

Jerry Falwell on 9-11: "The ACLU has got to take a lot of blame for this" and "the pagans and the abortionists and the feminists and the gays and the lesbians"

Rush Limbaugh on the Icelandic volcano: "God’s reaction to health care’s passage"

"Pastor" Danny Nalliah of the suitably named "Catch the Fire Ministries" on the Australian wildfires: "His conditional protection has been removed from the nation of Australia, in particular Victoria, for approving the slaughter of innocent children in the womb"

Man, these sh*theads are the most convincing argument for atheism out there. If there really was a God like theirs, could you imagine the short tempered pr*ck ever having patience enough to build the world in the first place? The first time, say, a head didn't fit right on a giraffe, he'd have just yelled "f*ck it!", thrown his cosmic toolbox down and abandoned the whole project. C*ntservative God sounds more like a mean drunk with ADD than a deity. Can you say "projection"?



  1. The levels of irony continue to stack up, as this morning's news reports "crazy eyes" Bachman saying the hurricane and earthquake are god talking to D.C.
    Wingnut weather reports are becoming a daily staple, but you would think the one's from the Texas / Oklahoma (Perry, Colburn, Robertson, Inhofe..etc...) region would notice that jebus is slowly converting their own part of the country in to a literal version of "hell on earth".
    I live in an area that is now almost always depicted as dark crimson (exceptional drought)...there goes that irony thing again red states. It looks like we are going to have over 100 days over 100 degrees this year. It has not rained 3 inches here since last October.
    I would love nothing more than to have god curse us with a hurricane that would park its ass over my house for about a week. Maybe the Red River would stop looking like the Mohave desert.
    Those prayer vigils seem to be really pissing god off as lets stop that....and start seeding some god damn clouds...if we ever get any again.

  2. Anon, I can't get my head round a mentality that would deny these events (excepting the earthquake) just might be something to do with global warming, despite masses of hard scientific evidence suggesting that view, yet instead ardently opts for believing it is the activity of some elusive, supernatural being who lives up in the sky somewhere watching everythign we do and intervenes to punish us accordingly. It's been raining where I live almost constantly all week, yet on Saturday it was the Gay Pride parade through the centre of the city: suddenly the rain stopped and the sunshine came out. Guess that proves God really loves gays.

  3. Yes, I too have struggled in my attempts at understanding the minds of people who believe the omniscient creator of the vast cosmos is so butt hurt (pardon the pun) at the skin tone or sexual proclivities of various people, that he spends a lot of time crafting various geological / meteorological disasters to mess up their lives.
    The only thing recently to make me have a passing thought of his (gods) possible existence, was the news story about Jim Inhofe (climate change denier extraordinaire and self proclaimed "not at all gay")coming down with a horrible respiratory infection after swimming in the algae infested lake where he has a home. (Infested because standing water without rain has a tendency to know... get algae infested....)
    Now that's the kind of god I could be down with!!


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