Ted Nugent: Professional White Trash

Ted Nugent does white power in Mississippi:

Nugent commented approvingly that he saw so many white people in the audience. He commended Dubuque for being a "white town." The crowd -- not just a few fans here and there -- cheered.

Let me shock you: I f*cking hate Ted Nugent.

Well, gee whizz, you might say... of course a tofu-munching liberal like me's gonna hate the Nuge (or whatever the hell they used to call this pr*ck in 1975). It's as natural as cats and dogs.

But trust me, this isn't just a case of cartoon liberal stereotype abhoring cartoon conservative stereotype. I live in small-town Texas not Berkeley. I'm not a stereotype. I like shootin' stuff, riding four-wheelers, eating brisket and I've never owned a Prius. I mix on a daily basis with folks whose necks are so big and red they make Nugent, for all his posturing, look like just another "showbiz queer". If I hated paleoconservatives automatically and reflexively, if I was a cartoon liberal stereotype, I'd literally have no-one to talk to. And I'd probably have succumbed to a rage-induced stroke years ago.

Nope, I don't hate Nugent because of who he wants you to think he is. My hate for him is not based on what he says or how he chooses to project his id. It's based on the fact that he's a poisonous imbecile whose busy selling bigotry just to keep his own pathetic career alive. Really, would anyone even know about Ted f*cking Nugent anymore if he wasn't constantly popping off, trying so desperately to upset mild-mannered liberals and sucking up to hicks who know no better?

Most celebrities - even z-listers like Nugent - try quite hard to keep their more antisocial opinions to themselves lest they escape into the public sphere and compromise their careers. But Ted Nugent is a rare example of someone whose career continues to exist only because of his publicly expressed, horrible opinions. He's found a loophole. And every other week, it's time for c*ntchops to make some new racist or otherwise offensive statement in order to keep himself 'relevant'.

There's a big difference between Nugent and real rednecks: Billy Bob at the gas station ain't ever gonna get rich bitching about 'nigras' and Mexicans. He's safely unfamous. Same goes for Skeeter on his porch dreaming of the stars and bars and the smell of freshly lubed guns... Billy Bob and Skeeter don't get to tour the country playing 'Cat Scratch Fever' for the millionth time, making stupid reality shows and actually paying taxes. But Nugent does. This piece of sh*t is poison to society, poison to good manners and poison to the dumb folks he turns dumber just so he can stay rich being professional white trash. It's not what he does, it's why he does it. That's what sticks in my craw.