Extremist Nutjobs Find Common Ground in Mutual Hatred of Soccer

"We are warning all the youth of Somalia not to dare watch these World Cup matches. It is a waste of money and time and they will not benefit anything or get any experience by watching mad men jumping up and down."

Said Sheikh Mohamed Abdi Aros, a spokesman for the Somali militant group Hizbul-Islam.

"We don't want the World Cup. We don't like the World Cup. We don't like soccer. We want nothing to do with it."

Said Glenn Beck, a spokesman for the American militant group Fox News.